A Note on Long-Distance Relationships and Separate Lives

A Note on Long-Distance Relationships and Separate Lives
Many of the succeeding episodes deal with the difficulties and challenges of long-distance relationships (LDRs).
I think that these difficulties are not just the constraints of distance and time but more from the establishment of separate lives.  What once was a couple's shared life woven ever so intimately from the strands of each other's individual lives to form a single tapestry, now becomes two very different, very separate lives that do not intersect at all or intersect only very briefly and superficially.  Suddenly, their realities become so estranged that one no longer recognizes the other's reality and even has this strange feeling of detachment and inability to imagine the other's life.
As time goes by, it becomes harder to imagine the other as being part of this new life or of being a part of it in the future. As time goes by, what was so easily "us" becomes "I" and "you" and "us" becomes harder to remember or imagine without deliberate effort.

Amazing cinematography! While I thought Dolce Amore had some good cinematic scenes, this one is magnificent. Offhand, I cannot think of any other telesrye that can match this.

By this second episode, I can appreciate the thoughtful effort put into casting.  The child leads, Zaijian and Alyanna, have worked together in the period teleserye, Ikaw Lamang, playing young Coco Martin and young Kim, and the team-up was great then and even more compelling now.

The transition to the older Macoy and Tin is beautifully done with that almost ethereal underwater scenes.  And instantly, there is this sizzling current between these two characters that is undeniable and palpable on screen.

Amazing cinematography! While I thought Dolce Amore had some good cinematic scenes, this one is magnificent. Offhand, I cannot think of any other telesrye that can match this.

By this second episode, I can appreciate the thoughtful effort put into casting.  The child leads, Zaijian and Alyanna, have worked together in the period teleserye, Ikaw Lamang, playing young Coco Martin and young Kim, and the team-up was great then and even more compelling now.

The transition to the older Macoy and Tin is beautifully done with that almost ethereal underwater scenes.  And instantly, there is this sizzling current between these two characters that is undeniable and palpable on screen.

Amazing cinematography! While I thought Dolce Amore had some good cinematic scenes, this one is magnificent. Offhand, I cannot think of any other telesrye that can match this.

By this second episode, I can appreciate the thoughtful effort put into casting.  The child leads, Zaijian and Alyanna, have worked together in the period teleserye, Ikaw Lamang, playing young Coco Martin and young Kim, and the team-up was great then and even more compelling now.

The transition to the older Macoy and Tin is beautifully done with that almost ethereal underwater scenes.  And instantly, there is this sizzling current between these two characters that is undeniable and palpable on screen.

Amazing cinematography! While I thought Dolce Amore had some good cinematic scenes, this one is magnificent. Offhand, I cannot think of any other telesrye that can match this.

By this second episode, I can appreciate the thoughtful effort put into casting.  The child leads, Zaijian and Alyanna, have worked together in the period teleserye, Ikaw Lamang, playing young Coco Martin and young Kim, and the team-up was great then and even more compelling now.

The transition to the older Macoy and Tin is beautifully done with that almost ethereal underwater scenes.  And instantly, there is this sizzling current between these two characters that is undeniable and palpable on screen.

Amazing cinematography! While I thought Dolce Amore had some good cinematic scenes, this one is magnificent. Offhand, I cannot think of any other telesrye that can match this.

By this second episode, I can appreciate the thoughtful effort put into casting.  The child leads, Zaijian and Alyanna, have worked together in the period teleserye, Ikaw Lamang, playing young Coco Martin and young Kim, and the team-up was great then and even more compelling now.

The transition to the older Macoy and Tin is beautifully done with that almost ethereal underwater scenes.  And instantly, there is this sizzling current between these two characters that is undeniable and palpable on screen.

On Human Rights Day

On The Anniversary of Human Rights Day



It has been more than 30 years, but
for me, it is a time, once more, of remembrance.
Remembering Filipino young people who, once upon a time,
fought for the right
to have a voice, a vote;


For the right
to dispel the darkness
of the dictator's shadow
and know the taste of freedom
from one man's megalomania and greed;




For the right
for all a nation's people
to have a share of land,
of industry, of identity,
of education, of opportunity, of dignity;




For the right
against oppression; the right to know:
the culture of life and hope,
instead of the perpetual fear
of death and killing fields.


It is also a time
for lamentation
for youth lost, for innocence lost,
for futures lost;


It is a time
of grief, not only
for all who were lost
but also for those who survived:


the loss of idealism, 

the loss of belief
that every courageous act
had consequence;


that every sacrifice
had meaning.



MV Lazaro-Elemos
12/10/2015
Rochester, MN

Love

Love bravely, deeply,
or not at all.

Love unabashedly,
untethered, unfettered.

Love with abandon,
without strategy, without speculation.

Love achingly, thirstily,
or love, 

not at all.

 11/17/15
 Rochester, MN

Karanasang “Heneral Luna” Para sa Isang Fil-Am

Lubos ang pananabik ng aking pamilya simula nang masagap namin ang balitang ipapalabas ang “Heneral Luna” sa Minnesota.  Magmula nang ipalabas ito sa Pilipinas at humakot ng napakaraming
papuri mula sa mga manonood, naging isa na ang pelikulang  ito sa mga paborito naming paksa sa hapag-kainan. Kasama na rito ang mga paksang may kinalaman sa digmaang Pilipino-Amerikano, mga paksang tumutukoy sa kasaysayan ng Pilipinas at sa mga bayani ng lupang hinirang.  Natawa rin kami sa isang pahayag na may ilang manonood ang nagtaka kung bakit walang masyadong ginawa ang actor na gumanap sa papel ni Apolinario Mabini, ni hindi raw siya lumakad o tumayo man lang. Biro ng aking asawa na, kung biglang tumayo o tumakbo si Mabini, kabahan na tayo.


Isang Biyernes ng gabi ng Nobyembre, pagkatapos ng trabaho at eskwela, dali-daling naghanda ang aking pamilya ng baon na pagkain at inumin at bumiyahe ng halos dalawang oras para makarating sa AMC Cinema sa Inver Grove, Minnesota. Pagdating doon, maging ang Amerikanong nagbibili ng tiket sa takilya ay nagpahayag ng pagkabilib sa pelikula.  Napanood daw niya ito dahil may mga sub-titles naman daw na Ingles. Puno ang sinehan ng hindi lang mga kababayan, na ang iba ay nanggaling pa sa mga malalayong karatig estado, kundi pati na rin ng ibang lahi.

Astig. Ang pelikula  ay isang makabayang biopic ni Antonio Luna, ang heneral na namuno sa hukbong sandatahang pangrebolusyonaryo ng Pilipinas laban sa mananakop na Amerikano matapos mabili ng bansang Estado Unidos ang Pilipinas mula sa Kastila noong 1898.

Ang pelikula ay matapang, mapangahas; sa kataga ng aking anak na tinedyer, "Astig." Ang mga diyalogo o sagutan ay prangka, tuwiran at walang pakundangan. Sa isang eksena, habang pinag-uusapan ang kakulangan sa sundalo at sandata para sa pagsulong ng digmaan, inatasan ni Aguinaldo si Luna na si Luna na ang bahala at ang digmaan ay nasa kamay na niya. Sagot ni Luna, ano daw ba ang gusto ni Aguinaldo na gawin niya, "kagatin ang kalaban?"

Walang iyakan o drama, bagkus tahasang itinuturo ang mga bida, contrabida, kaaway at kakampi ng walang pasintabi, walang paghingi ng paumanhin.

Ang mabuti sa Pilipino.  May ilang mga mabubuting katangian ng Pilipino na ipinapakita sa pelikula. Para sa akin, ang isa sa mga tumatak na eksena ay iyong nagpakita ng pakikibaka ng kababaihan sa digmaan at sa pagsulong ng makabayang kamalayan. Sa ilang eksena, ipinakita rin ang angking katapangan ng lahi at ang kapasidad nito na mamuhunan ng dugo at pawis at magbuwis ng buhay para sa kapakanan ng nakararami. Kung tutuusin, napakarami nating mga bayani sa ating kasaysayan.  Ang ilan dito ay kilala at tanyag nguni't marami rin na hindi napapangalanan, tulad ng mga bayaning ipinaglaban ang kalayaan laban sa diktadurang Marcos; mga mamamahayag na namatay sa pangungusap ng katotohanan; mga kasapi ng mga NGO; mga guro, doktor, nars, midwife at volunteer barangay health workers na nagsisilbi sa mga lugar na liblib at mapanganib; at mga OFW na nakikipagsapalaran sa iba't ibang panig ng mundo, nilalabanan ang lubos na pangungulila at hirap ng trabaho, para sa kapakanan ng pamilya.

Ang hamon.  Kung mayroon mang kataga sa pelikula na, para sa akin, ay tagos sa puso, ito yung mga salitang binitiwan ng isang pagod, bigo, at dismayadong Luna: " Kalaban mo na ang kalaban.  Kalaban mo rin ang kakampi."  Napakalungkot isipin na sa ating kasaysayan, sa atin mismo nanggagaling ang pang-aalipusta sa lahing kayumanggi.  Nananatiling hamon sa ating lahat, pati na rin sa ating nangibang-bayan, na magkaisa sa ating mga organisasyon; na magkaroon ng isang tinig sa ating mga adhikain; na makipag-ugnayan sa isa't isa ng may kalinga. Hindi maiiwasan na magkaroon tayo ng mga salungat na kuro-kuro o saloobin nguni't  maaari tayong magbukas ng isipan, magpakita ng paggalang para sa lahat, kaparehas man o hindi natin sa pananaw. Kailangan nating ipahayag ang ating mga saloobin na may pag-unawa na, kaakibat ng ating karapatan sa malayang pamamahayag, ay ang katungkulan natin sa responsableng paraan ng pamamahayag.

Kamalayang-bansa para sa lahat ng Pilipino saan man sa mundo.
Kamalayang-bansa -- isang konsepto na mailap para sa karamihang Pilipino. Hindi tayo nagkukulang sa pagsulong ng kamalayang pansarili, o pampamilya.  Bilang isang lahi, napakamaalam natin sa usaping pag-ibig-- pag-ibig sa sinisinta, sa magulang, sa anak, sa kapatid, sa kanayon.  Nguni't    hinihiling na sa atin ng ating kasaysayan, ng ating panahon, na manindigan para sa pag-ibig sa inang bayan. Ani Andres Bonifacio: " Aling pag-ibig ba ang hihigit kaya/ sa pagkadalisay at pagkadakila/ gaya ng pag-ibig sa tinubuang lupa?/ aling pag-ibig pa?/ wala na nga wala.

Paano natin maisusulong ang isang kamalayang-bansa?

Una, isali sa pagsulong ng kamalayang-bansa ang lahat ng Pilipino saan man sa mundo.  Tapos na ang panahon ng panunumbat sa Pilipinong lumisan sa bansang sinilangan sa iba't ibang kadahilanan.  Ang lahat ng Pilipinong nangangarap ng kaunlaran, kalayaan, kaginhawaan para sa lahat ay may puwang sa usaping bayan. Ang lahat ng may ambag para sa kaunlaran at may malasakit para sa bayan ay may karapatang makilahok sa pagsulong ng kamalayang-bansa, saan man sila sa mundo.

Pangalawa, magsanay tayo sa mga ugaling maka-Diyos at makabayan katulad ng disiplina sa sarili, pagsisikap sa kabuhayan, pagmamalasakit sa kapwa, pag-alaga sa kalikasan.  Simulan natin sa ating mga sarili ang mga pagbabagong gusto nating makita sa ating lipunan.  Kung ayaw natin ng korupsiyon, huwag tayong tumanggap ng lagay o mag-lagay. Huwag tayong maghalal ng mga pinunong malabo ang integridad. Kung gusto natin ng kapayapaan, makibahagi tayo sa usaping pangkatarungan at makilahok tayo sa pagsulong ng mga batas na makatarungan.  Sumunod tayo sa mga ordinansiya ng katahimikan sa ating komunidad, hindi yung wala tayong pakialam na magpatugtog ng malakas o mag-karaoke sa kalye ng magdamag.  Kung gusto natin ng isang mapagmalasakit na lipunan, magmalasakit tayo lalo na sa mga pinaka-nangangailangan sa atin.

Pangatlo, para sa atin na ginawa nang pangalawang tahanan ang ibang bayan, malaki pa rin ang maitutulong natin sa lupang pinagmulan.  Huwag nating isipin na nakakalamang tayo sa ating mga kababayan sa Pilipinas at mayroon na tayong karapatan na magkibit-balikat; magreklamo pero hindi makilahok; pumuna sa lahat ng mga suliranin ng bayan pero walang balak na makisama sa solusiyon.  Maaari tayong magbigay suporta sa mga organisasyon at proyekto na tunay na nakakatulong sa bayan, tulad ng mga programang "micro-finance o micro- lending"; mga programang pangkalusugan o pang-edukasyon. Makilahok tayo sa usaping halalan, pulitika, ekonomiya, pagsulong ng mga batas, pangalaga sa karapatang pantao.

Panghuli, kailangan nating maunawaan na may mga kamalayang naluluklok lamang,  namamahay lamang sa kaibuturan ng ating inang wika; mga kamalayang hindi kailanman lubos na maipapahiwatig  ng anumang wikang banyaga.  Hindi masama na tayo'y bihasa sa anumang wikang banyaga, nguni't dalhin pa rin natin ang ating wika sa ating mga puso; bigkasin ito ng may pagmamalaki; hayaan itong pagyamanin ang ating pagkakakilanlan; at ipamana ito sa mga susunod pa na mga henerasyong kayumanggi.

Heto na ang mga karanasang "Heneral Luna" na aking isina-papel.  Panahon na para tuluyan at taos-pusong isabuhay.


MVLazaro-Elemos
ika-15 ng Nobyembre, 2015
Rochester, MN

STORIES OF THE STREET:

  The Laughter of Brown Children

If there is one memory of home that remains as vivid, clear and strong as the day it was made, that, for me, is the memory of brown children's laughter.  The distance from home and the length of time away from it only seems to increase the resonance and timbre of the memory.

There are many occasions to remember.  I remember the twilights where I would sit at the stoop of my home-community clinic in Barrio San Antonio and watch the children laugh and race each other, kicking up dust under bare feet, scurrying home, town-crying,"Marimar na, Marimar na" to signal the start of the town's soap-opera watching ritual.  The men would gather at the corner store and in a while, the children, losing their initial excitement for the TV soap, would come back out to the streets to children's banter and to cajole from the menfolk some rock candy. 

I remember the children's excitement when, one weekend, the adults decided to clear the empty lot across from the clinic and put in a swing in the guava tree.  Armed with whatever tools they could find at home or borrow from neighbors, the children joined us at work, digging out weeds, trimming hedges, moving out rocks, until we could put an old tire up with some strong rope to make a swing. By late afternoon, we also had a couple of borrowed benches under the aratilis tree and the store-owner at the end of the street came by with enough piping hot Payless noodle soup to share with everyone.

I remember hot summers of children's laughter at the well, ringing out, as the children filled buckets, formed mud puddles and splashed and chased each other with cool well-water while the women finished their laundry with radio drama in the background.  Inside the clinic, going about my work, I would listen to the outside noises of life and be comforted that even in sorrow, in sickness, or in death, it seemed that the laughter was never far behind.  It was even there on the day of the early summer, when boys just graduated from elementary school would come, in brave and nervous groups, into my clinic, for circumcision, prepared for a rite of passage into manhood.

It seems much like the promise of the Little Prince to the aviator in Antoine d'Saint Exupery's, "The Little Prince." That no matter where the aviator was after their parting, the aviator need only to look at a star to hear the Little Prince's laughter, for every star shall laugh like him.  And as much as there are millions of stars in the sky, so shall there be millions of echoes of the Little Prince's laughter.

So it is for me.  Wherever I traveled, wherever I lived, I would hear very,very close to my ears  -- in the oddest moments, in a split-instance of time, in reverie or in action, in company or in solitude -- the laughter of brown children --laughing in that way only brown children can. And I am bound, once more, to home.

M.V. Lazaro-Elemos

February 2001

New York City

Tula Para sa Mga Sikat at Sisikat Pa

Tula Para sa Mga Sikat at Sisikat Pa

Nawa'y huwag kang mabulag
sa tindi ng ilaw entablado,
dahil baka
sa silaw,
di ka na niya maaninag.

Nawa'y huwag kang mabingi
sa mga tili at hiyawan,
dahil baka
sa ingay,
di mo na marinig ang tibok ng puso niya.

Nawa'y huwag kang mahilo
sa tugatog ng kasikatan,
dahil baka
sa dumog ng sumasamba,
mawalan ng puwang

ang mahalagang ISA;

ang sabay na payapang pagsilay sa bukang-liwayway;

ang pagyapos sa tunay na minamahal sa duyan ng dapithapon.

Nawa'y may puwang ka,
Nawa'y may puwang ka pa,
sa mahalagang isa.


MVLE
10/8/2015
Rochester, MN

The Good, the Bad, and the Sad of the Kalyeserye/Aldub Phenomenon
(published in the 10/1/15 edition of rappler.com)

 

Anyone interested in understanding the Filipino people; any student of Philippine society or Philippine movements would be remiss to brush aside this phenomenon (and it does qualify as a phenomenon no matter what intellectual snobs may say).  To not take this the phenomenon that is Kalyeserye/Aldub; not attempt to scrutinize it, take it apart, and understand it, is to lose an opportunity to better understand a people’s collective conscious and subconscious.  More importantly, it is also to lose the opportunity to possibly recreate this wildfire response for other societal issues and concerns.  In the recent  Innovation +Social Good Summit symposium in Manila,  Chief Justice Sereno, in part of her speech that discussed using social media to enhance judicial reform, alluded to the  AlDub phenomenon by saying,” if only a fraction of the attention lavished  on Aldub can be given to issues related to judicial reform..”

My own interest in Kalyeserye/Aldub was first peaked by people’s responses to it.  Almost overnight, twitter erupted with Aldub tweets; Facebook with “pabebe waves”; blogs with Aldub- related posts. One of my hospital colleagues would ask me what it was  in the Philippines that was raking in a million tweets a day with a hashtag that sounded like “lub-dub”  (more commonly known in the hospital as the sound the heart makes when you listen using a stethoscope). So, I watched all the replays, followed the evolution of kalyeserye, trolled the web, read tweets, blogs and articles, looked at fan artwork and listened to songs.  I saw and felt the draw and soon, I, too, waxed poetic over love. I, too, began to speculate what was real and reel and I, too, began to make judgments and take sides.

Here is my take on the good, the bad, and the sad of Kalyeserye/Aldub.

The good first:

1. Kalyeserye gives us a filipino slice of life.  It could not unfold anywhere better than the “kalye”, where our parties spill over, where our wakes spill over; witness to our frustrations and our dreams; the path we may take to escape but always the path we take to eventually return to who we basically are.
2. Maine Mendoza.  She is the most refreshing thing to happen to pinoy showbiz in a long, long time, ironically because she is so antithetical to what showbiz has become. When showbiz abounds with self-absorbed , over-glamorized, petulant pseudo-personalities, we are gifted with this un- Belo-fied free spirit; a frank, confident , risk-taking sprite who really believes that life would be so much less complicated if people would just say what they feel.  What a breath of fresh air!
3. The re-definition of “masa” and “asal-kalye”.  It used to be that these two words were totally and absolutely derogatory and disdainful.  Not anymore.  “Masa” now connotes a wider base of people.  “Masa” now, instead of something shameful is something we can wear like a badge of honour.  “Asal-kalye” is the same.  Now, we can say that because of all the skills and the lessons we learned in the streets of our lives, we have found the ability to transcend, achieve, succeed. From a political-social standpoint, I believe this is an increasing experience of democracy because democracy is trustful of the common sentiment, the common decision, the common people.  Slowly, we are starting to realize that influence or change need not come only from the will of the few elite.
4. There is a collective POWER in a commonly shared idea, emotion, issue, concern.  The next step is to figure out what is the power source:  is it love? Passion? Romanticism? Youth? and harness that power for other societal concerns.

Now, the bad.

1. Addiction and withdrawal.  Lately, I have been reading more and more about people replaying episodes 10 or more times; scrutinizing every facial expression; lip-reading every exchange ; making sense of every movement that the Aldub makes.  Also, people are starting to joke about needing ”rehab” , meaning that they are starting to realize that either  this has evolved to become an obsession, has been interfering with their functional lives, has been affecting areas of their lives such as work, school, relationships or have started bringing up uncomfortable feelings when gratification ( watching the show) has to be delayed.
2. Allowing life to pass us by.  We have to realize that this not our real lives.  Aldub is a product of  showbiz of which we are consumers and we should consume with moderation.  We have to invest in our real lives, real relationships, real worlds, real dreams, real challenges, no matter how frustrating they are.   Imagine the effect if we invested the same amount of time we invest in this show into our own relationships, our jobs and our dreams.
3. Dangerous concept of ideal love.  The more posts and tweets I read, the more I see girls buying into the concept that somewhere out there is a knight-in-shining-armor who will sweep them off their feet, shower  them with flowers as he chops wood and fetches water, and pluck the stars out of the sky to lay at their feet.  And all she has to do is to wait for the “tamang panahon.” Nothing could be farther from the truth.  Love does not just fall out of the sky in a gold-gilded package wrapped with a bow.  It does not come to those who passively wait.  Instead, it MEETS you on the road you choose to walk towards a better version of yourself.  Love comes to you on your journey to pluck the stars that only you can pluck, to fulfill the dreams only you can fulfill, to claim the happiness only you can claim.

 

And, the sad.

Behind the banter, the gaiety and all the outward joy that emanates from all of us spectators, there is a  sadness lurking in the shadows.  We have become a desperately, acutely, achingly lonely people, searching for human connections; authentic relationships; any semblance of hope,”kilig” to jumpstart our splintered lives; living our lives as spectators and hope that our happiness is fulfilled for us by two people.   So, we tweet and facebook; rejoice when our tweets are re-tweeted or our posts liked; feel dejected when they are buried under the 25M other tweets or million other posts.  We wait for affirmation and beg for even the slightest acknowledgment.  We so pray that this reel relationship would be real for that proves to us that authentic relationships do exist. Meanwhile, the challenge for us  is not to escape reality but to embrace it and influence it.

 

So, let us all do enjoy Kayeserye and Aldub.  Let us continue to tweet and facebook , laugh at the comedic genius of its performers and creators, and rejoice in the social media connections we are making.  But, let us not forget the very real in our lives and the very real human connections we should also be making.  Most of all, let us not underestimate our own power to choose and claim real happiness,  fulfill real dreams, rise above real challenges and adversities, and come out from all of these as better versions of ourselves.

 

MVLE

Rochester, MN

9/30/15